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Darkmatterwaiting to be seen... 9/5/2006 Electra说就在等这一天的到来，多少被动，但这一天就是在无知的等待中来了。
我是真的要走了。
刚考完时比现在准备还充分，但所有的悸动，憧憬，在这大半年的emotional roller-coaster中消磨，殆尽，麻木。有人说不喜欢往中文中突然蹦出几个英文词，说那是词语匮乏。我就是。所有伴我一路走来的诸子百家，汉皇武帝，苏格拉底，康德萨特，也都如轻云一样，随风飘过，清清爽爽，不留一点痕迹。我就是等不及啊。爸爸说你不要好高骛远，还真是这么回事，不然我以为自己成博学家呢。看来我唯一做好的一件事就是没把德语学了。
不要再开玩笑了。我看着爸爸低头的眼神，妈妈伫立的身影，眼睛就红了，我是真的要走了啊。生命不能承受之重莫过于永远猜不透他们的心思，总是在你轻松时悄悄地掩饰担心，在你在你专著时远远地避开，不经意发现，原来他们是永远注视的目光。还是不要试图说清楚了，在这个领域，语言失去一切效力。我可以肯定，我会哭的，从来都不是坚强的人，只是这眼泪，流给自己罢了。
8/30/2006 may i come in, Jung?synchronicity itself is a synchronicity.
synchronicity, is, a song, i downloaded today, deja vu, happens to be another.
i'm not sure about that, Jung, i do not have the gall to explain it, considering my ignorance. i actually resent the cheesey way these songs using such names. it violates these pure pristine sacred words, yeah, sacred in my heart.
forgiving me for not recognising your name the first time i heard(not see) it. thanks to Mark, who brought the word to me. so i have one more reason to know more about you.
don't laugh at me. i'm a psychology virgin, but my virginity is yours. maybe i'm learning German just to understand you directly, Jung, let it be a synchronicity.
i know great minds are talking inside the room, couldn't be more out of my league, but i'm not feeling left out, coz i'm just standing against the same wall, getting ready to ask
may i come in, Jung? 8/29/2006 bubbles& bubblesSpecial thanks to all the people who draged me back to reality whenever I came to the edge of reason.
you're just totally stunned when something you've dreamed of forever suddenly appeared, so naturally, and it's just not like that, not at all like what you've imaginged. just a little bit at lost.
another dream-containing bubble has broken.
they thought their lives sucked. 8/26/2006 要被贮存的记忆昨天晚上突然意识到我以后的生活可能会没有了它，我一直寄予它的希望在最后时刻终于要破灭了...
风雨交加的夜晚与一个人一起走在犹他州贫瘠的荒漠上，听耳边摩门教徒的祷告，为了一枚戒指活下去。
苏格兰静谧的田园乡道，铜山毛榉丛中隐约露出的白墅一角，落叶覆盖的柔软草皮，夕阳下沼泽地里的座座大石，博斯克姆比溪谷淙淙的流水，每一个正义之手不曾触及的角落。没人能偷走我的白色银额马。
看波希米亚贵族绝望的歇斯底里，美艳女主人凄婉的哀求，听每座拿破仑半身像打碎后死样的寂静，感受手中五颗桔核异样悸动，不要报复，你胜得过他么？
Synchronicity~记忆中莫名出现就再也挥之不去的Helen，她在有黄色雏菊壁纸的房间里吗？喝牛奶的慈祥老太太，忘了画中翩翩似仙的睡莲了吧。最好拆开你的网球拍柄，说不定里面有宝石呢。那放在墙角的番木鳖，看起来那么诱人，穿过疯狂party的喧闹人群，送入干渴已久的口中。爱惜你的身体吧，原来每一个部位都见证着所有的一切。
我的一切，一切，一切，在眼睛瞄准准星时变得无比清晰，子弹击倒目标的一刹那，我听见心中重重的一叩，有人为我打开这扇门么？
我希望希区柯克附体，让我把这一切延续下去...
希望是暂时告别。
8/24/2006 Frued, 这是什么？..."Come with me, Meg," 船长的小艇终于靠近了大船，但吊下来的软梯半截是海雾，如果向上爬...扯开这该死的云翳...Mark在讲课，熟悉的微笑，irene的lomo, 定格在水银灯照耀的晚上，没有我...紧紧地抱住一个粉色的身影，原来没有什么不可能，不要放手...还是得跳舞...花名册上清清楚楚的注释，没有见过的照片...坠落，坠落，终于安息了... 8/10/2006 象腿兰！今天去植物园。
 觉得自己是一只标榜要吃草的熊（真需要吃的时候不用标榜），显然目的不纯，呵呵。不过很多东西都是无意间收获的，比如植物学知识，比如热爱花草的高尚情操，比如好看的合欢花，还比如...象腿兰!!哈哈！ 象腿兰又名酒瓶兰，为龙舌兰科。酒瓶兰属常绿小乔木，原产墨西哥。喜日照充足，较喜肥，喜砂质壤土，耐干燥，耐寒力强。在海南和华南沿南可露地越冬。盆栽株高可达1米，茎形状奇特，干的基部特别膨大，状如酒瓶。膨大部分具有厚木栓层的树皮，且龟裂成小方块。叶细长、线形、薄革质、变垂；叶缘细锯齿。鹅嫩，象腿兰！象腿快来啊！找到你妹妹了！
有好多她的照片呢，我狂贴！ 8/9/2006 hell, devilohmigod, Graydon Carter, Miuccia Prada, Donatella Versace, Cynthia Rowley, to name a few. i was intimidated by a whole set of remarkable items, quite meaningless yet irresistable. maybe there really is something inside every girl that chases the vogue, or, just a symbol. better not, seeing Andrea got a job a million girls would die for to assist the most powerful woman in fashion, Miranda, at what a price. but while Andrea can still be inspired to slam doors on Miranda's face, it's Miranda a pathetic manipulated sticked to her own conceited world and became a devil. yeah, a devil, sometimes powerful women are a thousand times bitter than powerful men. never try to be more than yourself.
maybe so easy to be a devil.
8/8/2006 nonsensegood, i can't write in Chinese which is such a blessing beause i don't wanna
 i'm bored bored totally bored that i've always well known. net is exhilarating friends are great but i've got enough of this, never getting more than this, never ever will. never will be a cybermania.
 ok, be cool, i'm not complaining or anything, just try to figure out the right thing with a flowing mind. i'm not the talktive pointing-out-the-irony-with-my-little-witness type of person, i guess i'm more of the wolf type, always need to be grounded to feel strength.
 so i'll just grasp something right there, dump something out of no where---let others be a DOA. make a PC deterrent, be a sweet simple life.
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